Sunday, December 2, 2012

Red Hook

Ta-daa! Found a giant warehouse full of garbage on my bike ride to Ikea.
The smell is exactly what you'd think it would be.




Monday, November 26, 2012

Martin vs Martin

Saw these

Can't stop thinking about the Opti-Grab

ugh

Tidbit from Thanksgiving 2012

My 6-year old niece plays with my old Barbies when she visits grandma. All that is left of the Donny Osmond doll that made the trek from Alabama to Seattle is his head and his disco purple shredded outfit (not pictured), but what is pictured on the lower right is Malibu Ken face down in a wedding dress. Yet another thing not pictured, when Charley woke up, hopped off the bed, and Catzilla'd through Doll City.

Two days after I took that photo, I see this listing on Etsy...
seems like those Donny outfits were barely meant to last into the 2000s.

Then I see this post on dlisted - Barbies on the brain...
I had several of those white plastic pizza savers as Barbie tables/stools.

Monday, August 13, 2012

This Song is 77 Years Old



Her other songs included "Stew Meat Blues", "Coffee Grindin' Blues", "My Georgia Grind", "Honeycomb Man", "Mr. Screw Worm In Trouble", and "Bo Hog Blues". Her final recordings with Roland and Josh White included two takes of "Shave 'Em Dry", recorded in New York on Tuesday March 5, 1935. The unexpurgated alternate take is notorious for its explicit sexual references, a unique record of the lyrics sung in after-hours adult clubs.

Lyrics:
I got nipples on my titties big as the end of my thumb,
I got somethin' 'tween my legs 'll make a dead man come,
Oooh daddy-baby, won't you shave 'em dry, oooh!
Won't you grind me baby, grind me till I cry.

Say I fucked all night and all the night before, baby,
And I feel just like I want to fuck some more,
Ooh, babe, goddamn daddy, grind me honey, shave 'em dry,
And when you hear me yowl baby, want you to shave 'em dry.

I got nipples on my titties big as the end of my thumb,
And daddy you can have 'em any time you want and you can make 'em come.
Oooh daddy, shave 'em dry,
And I can give you some baby, swear it'll make you cry.

I will turn back my mattress and let you oil my springs,
I want you to grind me daddy till the bells do ring,
Ooh daddy, want you to shave 'em dry.,
Oh pray God daddy, shave 'em baby, won't you try?

Now fuckin's one thing that'll take me to Hell,
I'll be fuckin' in the studio just to fuck that to leather,
Oooh, daddy, daddy shave 'em dry,
I would fuck you baby, honey I would make you cry.

Now your nuts hangs down like a damn bell-clapper,
And your stick stands up like a steeple,
Your goddamn asshole's open like a church door,
And the crabs walks in like the people,
Oooh baby, won't you shave 'em dry. ...

A big sow gets fat from eatin' corn,
And the pig gets fat from suckin',
Reason this whore got like, I am,
Great God I got fat from fuckin',
Whee ... tell 'em about me! Fuck it!

My back is made of whalebone and my cock is made of brass,
And my fuckin's made for workin' men, two dollars round to fit my ass,
Oooh daddy, shave 'em dry.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Rolling Stone - February 28, 1974



What about love?

Burroughs: Ugh.

Bowie: I'm not at ease with the word 'love'.

Burroughs: I'm not either.

Bowie: I was told that it was cool to fall in love, and that period was nothing like that to me. I gave too much of my time and energy to another person and they did the same to me and we started burning out against each other. And that is what is termed love..... that we decide to put all our values on another person. It's like two pedestals, each wanting to be the other pedestal.

Burroughs: I don't think that 'love' is a useful word. It is predicated on a separation of a thing called sex and a thing called love and that they are separate. Like the primitive expressions in the old South when the woman is on a pedestal, and the man worshipped his wife and then went out and fucked a whore. It is primarily a Western concept and then it extended to the whole flower power thing of loving everybody. Well, you can't do that because the interests are not the same.

Bowie: The word is wrong, I'm sure. It is the way you understand love. The love that you see, among people who say, ' we're in love', it's nice to look at.... but wanting not to be alone, wanting to have a person there that they relate to for a few years is not often the love that carries on throughout the lives of those people. There is another word. I'm not sure whether it is a word. Love is every type of relationship that you think of.... I'm sure it means relationship, every type of relationship that you can think of.

1974 article

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

...Having a Drink

"The thin, unhealthy-looking woman peers fixedly at the tempting drink. Her hands are like claws.
Picasso gave her hair the same form as the headgear worn by sick prostitutes in prison at this time."
—Think of that next time you see a gal on the street in a topknot.

Shoe disposition.

The one glove.

Picasso, Hopper, Degas... they cornered the market on painting stylish, lone women lost in thought drinking in caf├ęs.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Perfect For Your Desk!

I love how "possibly pooping" is a selling point.
http://www.etsy.com/listing/73807263/1980s-possibly-pooping-cabbage-patch

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Gabriel Orozco


Wednesday, April 25, 2012

1964-1965


I love every second of this performance.


But then this happens a year later.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Hair Talk 2012


Guys, GUYS, there are common abbreviated terms women use to describe hair lengths: BSL, APL, SL, and MBL. I never knew.
Bra Strap Length. Arm Pit Length, Shoulder Length, and Mid Back Length.

le sigh




Sunday, April 22, 2012

Shop Update, Unrealness

Fisby getting swallowed up by clutter.

New items added to the We Are Were shop - a few pairs of really unique vintage shoes, a million more things to come...

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Been thinking a lot about badass Banji Girl Realness.


And how basically everything I did today was the opposite, e.g, staying inside all day and ordering plants online that I remembered from my childhood.


Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Needs Moar Godz


Slow day at work, made some animated gifs from dog images I saved while researching Shutterstock. Forgot I even had these...
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Tuesday, March 20, 2012

SMH LOL


Sometimes a web ad fits the content so well. 
In other related news, "I would never fuck this no matter how much society is trying to tell me I should be into quirky, indie, arty, another annoying adjective, alt dudes like this". I'm not even *that* much of a contrarian, but everything inside me is so against this dude and his weird rubbing on my thigh kind of sex he thinks I'd also be into. Meow meow meow...

Monday, February 13, 2012

So, This Happened to Me...

In 2010 I had a job interview for a designer position with a company called Iconix Brand Group, Inc. The interview went Ok, I met with the Sr. Art Director and then her boss. The Sr AD seemed like she'd be someone who would be hard to work with, but her boss seemed really friendly, talkative and made me think a job with this company would be great. When the interviews were over the Sr AD said there would be a "design test" waiting for me in my inbox and to have it done by the morning of the next day. The test was to come up with a concept for the next Candie's shoe ad. I would have to come up with all copy (be a copywriter), the images (be a photographer), and of course design the whole thing (what I'd actually be doing if I got the job). The second part of the design test was to create an updated look for several webpages for Ocean Pacific. I thought about these "tests" (one print/one web) and how I'd be creating a lot of content for this company for upcoming real life projects, you know, giving them ideas and designs that they could just run with and I would not get the job or credit for. Like, an "all that work for nothing situation," like something out of Working Girl or countless other movies or TV show episodes. I kept thinking about it, the circumstances really worried me, so much so that I contacted my mother, a close girl friend who worked at a big ad agency, and the recruiter who got me the interview. Mostly everyone said, "Just do it, don't worry, blatant stealing like that doesn't really happen IRL."
Well...
is this just a coincidence?

Here is my June 2010 sample that I emailed them:
(Oh yeah, and I didn't get the job. Actually, they never got back to me.
I had to prod my recruiter several times to get an answer.)

And this is their curent Candie's spokesperson:

I also sent them something extra, another idea for a spokesperson...
I photoshopped her shoes into platforms, hah, I forgot I did that. I wish Candie's actually made shoes like that. I forgot that Candie's has a slutty image that appeals to no one and is not relevant at all. I wanted to make the brand better, cooler, more responsible and meaningful, like give them a point for being and actually be good for young women.

So, I just went back and found the old emails:

(from them)
Test project:
Design a home page or splash page and 1 secondary page for op.com Fall website based off the concept new vintage/movie night.
Design a 1 Candie’s National Ad for spring...concept and celebrity is open.

Candies is fun, young, flirty and usually has the top female music celebrity.
Op is cool california ...vans/roxy/billabong

Please complete this and send to Rebecca by Friday morning at the latest.


-------

(to them) I actually sent this at 5pm the night before the day it was due (ahead of time).
Hi Rebecca!

How are you?

Attached are the creative project items in a zipped file. For Candie's I did two different ads, one celebrity is more on-brand, Lea Michele from Glee. The other celebrity is another up-and-coming young singer with loads of style who I think is awesome and had a Gap TV spot two years ago, Janelle Monae.

Thanks!


-------

(I didn't hear anything for two weeks so I contacted my recruiter)
Hi Jocelyn,

How are you?

I was wondering if you've heard any new developments concerning the Iconix Brand Group designer position?

Thanks!


-------

(a week later I get this response from her)
I apologize for the delay. I have been out on vacation. While I was gone Iconix offered the position to another Designer. They liked your work but felt this person had an aesthetic sensibility that was more closely aligned with theirs.

I’ll definitely keep you in mind for others.


-------

(I forwarded that to my mom and got this response)
So sorry to learn that another company has yet again made a huge mistake. I know you would have done well there. Well, there must be something better waiting for you out there. I would still question about what happens to the free work you did for that company...

Also, seems odd that the headhunter did not have the professionalism to contact you, even if she was on vacation. What does "aesthetic sensibility" mean anyway?

Hang in there. Put out more feelers. Find more contacts. Sometimes it takes a lot of searching to find the right fit.


(personal family stuff paragraph that was in the original email which I took out for this)

Thanks for letting me know about the job. I really hope and believe that things will turn around for you soon.

Love you,
Mom


-------

Best. Mom. Ever.

-------

Also, I noticed that two months after all of this, the same job was available again through the recruiter. So, either they hired someone and it didn't work out, OR there was never a position and this is how Iconix goes about finding inspiration and new ideas – by using chumps like me.

I have another job now, a much better job, so I can look back on all this and laugh and not feel sad. But right after I didn't get the job I felt like shit, and then I re-felt like shit when I saw the Lea Michelle ads. (As a sidenote: I'm pretty sure I would've punched a hundred kittens if I saw ads all over the city featuring Janelle Monae in saddle shoe platforms. Then, after I was finished sobbing for a week and complaining to my friends how life isn't fair, I would've gone out and bought some saddle shoe platforms.)

Monday, February 6, 2012

Another gay dude with his cat, Another planet

Found another cat site called boyswithbeardswithcats, aka, 
gay guys with beards with cats.

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Seems there is never enough space on the internet for cute and boy and cat to come together in some sort of cock pussy tease for us all whether you're gay or straight. Each photo is at war with itself (or at least in my head) of dueling hot guy/cute cat vs never gonna get this/cat you will never pet. Add in beards, tattoos, the littlest kittens mid-mew, moody glances, low-lighting, shiny coats, shy smiles, hamburger faces, and sleeping...there's just too much torture to go around. Add this site to the many that have come before it.

http://cuteboyswithcats.net/
http://hotguyswithcats.tumblr.com/
http://boysandcats.tumblr.com/
http://www.flickr.com/groups/catandboy/
and so on...

I thought the Super Bowl halftime show was fine, speaking of...

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The theme for last month's Fake Criterions was Double Threats: Musicians who try to act. I thought Desperately Seeking Susan with Madonna would be a great one. I am very obsessed with Madonna's boots in this movie youhavenoidea. I really wanted to use this photo for the cover in some way cos the boots are so prominent.

I also really like this photo, it features the earrings which were the major plot point of the movie, but her elbow is cut off and therefore it's limiting to the layout I wanted to do.

So instead I used an image of one of my biggest memories I have of this movie...
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This one though, is actually the first idea I came up with that screams "Criterion".

While I was looking up images to use, I found this one of a blouse she wore in the movie that went for like ten grand at some auction. Good grief. Like, where is this top now? Is someone wearing it? Is it hanging in a special garment bag in a closet among other celebrity items that a collector is hoarding? I would wear this top now, I wish H&M would copy it...along with those rhinestone boots.


Ugh, the video is flipped horizontally on youtube for some reason...anyway, I must have seen this video a million times on MTV.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Can't Hug Every Cat

There are two kinds of cat ladies NYC can turn you into:

This:



Or this gem:


With me it could either way.


Sunday, January 15, 2012

Fact: Having a 9-5 job leaves no time for blogging


I got all this for $37. 
From a shop in Brooklyn. 
I know. 
I was only in there for about 20 minutes and didn't even dig around. It's like I stepped into a Twilight Zone episode, either the records are crawling with bed bugs or that Elie Tahari Chanel-ish knock-off jacket (with tags still attached) is haunted — or I wake up and it's all been a 1940s WWII experiment by the government. Anyway, it's Life Thrift on 5th Ave.

And Fis loves the giant bag. Win-win.